BUFFALO, N.Y. — The ever-growing memorials outside are a constant reminder of what happened, and the 10 people who were senselessly killed in a racist attack.
One month after the shooting at Tops grocery store on Jefferson Avenue in Buffalo, the psychological scars are evident.
"Some days you don't have no tears, you just keep busy. Other days, the reality sets in. You're like, 'oh man, did this really happen and why?'" said Jeanne Legall.
She was on her way to Tops for some ice cream on May 14, arriving to find a chaotic scene just minutes after the shooter began his rampage.
Minutes that could've meant the difference between life and death.
"You think about those 10 people who didn't make it out, and you have that 'why me?' It's like a rollercoaster. You don't want to be glad you're alive when they're dead, but you're glad that it wasn't you. My sons get to see me. Their children don't get to see them," she said.
Kevin Williams lives right around the corner from the store. He and his neighbors have been hurt to their core.
"Somebody going to come over here and kill all my friends in there, which I go to everyday. And now I'm sitting out here looking at all their pictures. How you think I'm feeling, man?" Williams said.
The Buffalo tragedy and other mass shootings across the country have brought the debate over gun reforms back to the forefront.
New York state passed new laws raising the age to 21 to buy a semi-automatic rifle and banned the sale of body armor to most civilians. They also expand so-called red flag laws that could keep certain people from having guns if they pose a danger to themselves or others. At the federal level, senators have a deal in place to expand mental health resources, funding to states for red flag laws and school safety, and an enhanced review process for gun buyers under 21.
U.S. Rep. Brian Higgins says it's not enough.
"I think it's a hopeful sign, but to me, it falls short. Not to have comprehensive backgrounds checks and a ban on assault weapons falls considerably short of what we need," Higgins said.
To Jeanne Lagall, gun reforms could help, but it's just as important to reach people before they commit hate crimes.
"They've also got to address what brought about that moment of him having that gun. He didn't have that gun because he liked guns. He was taught white supremacy," she said.
Tops is currently remodeling the store and plans to reopen later this summer. For some, the pain might be too much. For others, it's important the community takes back what's theirs in an area that has few options for full-service groceries.
"I already talked to some people and they said they ain't never going back in there," Williams said. "I had to think about it myself. I said I've got some people if they go back in there, I'm going to go back in there to see if they're working and know if they're okay."
Through the pain, Legall believes it's the support of the community, both near and far, that have helped people deal with the horrific nature of what occured on May 14.
"All 10 of those people are going to be the spirits on our shoulders that walk in with us. We're going to walk through that door and say hate did not win. Still here, we've still got our one store and we want five more," she said.