DALLAS — A big smile formed on 55-year-old Wendi Armstrong’s face when asked what her definition of Pride is.
“Pride means being able to be who I am and not being afraid anymore,” Armstrong said.
Armstrong and her 19-year-old son Devon were just two of many to sit down and share for the “Tell Me A Story, Texas” series hosted by yours truly. This series focuses on my belief that everyone has a story, and if you give people the opportunity to share, under the right circumstances, they will.
I’m bringing a small, very comfortable, floral-printed couch to events in cities across Texas and asking random people to sit down and tell me a story, whatever they’d like to share. This Pride Month, Spectrum News 1 is sharing real stories from proud, queer Texans.
For this project, I set up my “conversation couch” and cameras at Dallas Pride held in Fair Park the first weekend in June. Thousands showed up to celebrate during the two-day event in the same location where the Texas State Fair takes place.
Once I was set up, I had a line of people eager to sit down and share. I had already had five couch conversations when Wendi and Devon Armstrong decided to sit down. The two had caught my eye earlier in the day when they passed by.
It was obvious to me that they loved one another, and I gathered they were mother and son. I was curious to know their story and was very happy when they decided to sit down and chat with me. I leaned that Wendi and Devon Armstrong have a lot in common. They’re not just mom and son, they’re friends. They both have a love for music and are both passionate about education, just to name a few similarities.
Wendi Armstrong is a high school English teacher, and Devon Armstrong is currently studying as a music major at Tarleton State University with aspirations of teaching music abroad.
The similarity currently enriching their bond is how they’re separately navigating what it means to be a part of the LGBTQ+ community. Wendi Anderson came out at the age of 48, and Devon Armstrong more recently this year. Wendi Armstrong was married to Devon’s father for 25 years, and said although she loves him very much, she felt she was living a lie, always having feelings of being attracted to women.
“The first time I can remember having feelings for another girl was the fifth grade,” she said. “However, I never felt like I could tell people. Growing up Southern baptist, I lived a lifestyle where being gay was not OK.”
After a lifetime of shame, she ended her marriage and made the hard decision of divorcing the father of her children to come out as a lesbian.
“My ex is a good man and I love him. I just couldn’t live a lie anymore,” said Wendi Armstrong. “I felt if I didn't finally come out and say something, I was going to explode. I got really depressed and stayed that way for a long time. It took me a while to finally figure out what the problem was. When I finally decided to tell someone I was having these feelings, I felt so much better.”
Seeing his mom live a life of freedom is something Devon Armstrong envied for years. He was in junior high when his mom came out as a lesbian and knew he had the same feelings.
“I’ll be honest, I was upset,” he said. “When my mom came out, having kept that secret myself, it actually made me angry. It had a lot to do with me wishing I could have done the same. But after seeing the backlash she got, it made me more scared.”
During all his high school years, Devon Armstrong felt feelings of being attracted to both guys and girls, but he wasn’t comfortable coming out, not even to Wendi, who he knew would be supportive.
“I was 100% terrified of coming out,” said Devon Armstrong. “Probably more like 200% terrified. I thought if I did come out that my friends wouldn't accept me, my colleagues wouldn't accept me. I’ve found out since that's been quite the opposite. I now know they love me even more now that I'm able to be honest with them.”
Since coming out as bisexual, Devon Armstrong said he feels a sense of freedom he didn’t know he needed. He appreciates his coming-out process has been made easier by having a mom who understands where he’s coming from, compared to another teenager with parents who don’t understand what it means to not be straight.
When asked if he has any advice for someone his age afraid to come out, he answered, “To anyone who's struggling with this, where they're scared of it like I was, you need to know whoever that is in your life that does love you, if they truly do love you, it should not make a difference at all."
Wendi Armstrong celebrated her 55th birthday this month and said she feels lucky to be surrounded by love.
“I’m so proud to finally be living my truth,” she said. “The fact that we can now be out like this feels really nice. When I was Devon’s age, I didn’t want to come out. It was a bad time to be openly gay in the '80s, and the AIDS pandemic didn’t make that any easier. I hate that I held it in for such a long time. I wish I knew then what I know now.”
If you have an interesting story, or an issue you’d like to see covered, let us know about it.
Share your ideas with DFW human interest reporter Lupe Zapata by emailing him at Lupe.Zapata@Charter.com
Editor's Note: A previous version of this story had an incorrect spelling of Wendi and Devon Armstrong's last name. (Corrected 06/18)