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BEAVER DAM, Wis. — On Wednesday, 5-Stones Dodge County hosted a community event to spread awareness about the danger of sextortion.
Hundreds of community members filled the Beaver Dam High School auditorium to listen to stories from John DeMay and experts working to put a stop to sextortion, a form of sexual exploitation where the offender usually asks for explicit material and then threatens to release it unless the victim sends something like money.
Almost three years ago, John DeMay’s son Jordan took his own life after falling victim to sextortion.
“We lost Jordan to suicide, brutally sextored, it will be three years on March 25th, next week,” said DeMay.
DeMay’s son, Jordan, thought a female had reached out to him on Instagram asking for sexual pictures. His son sent the pictures and soon found out he made a mistake.
“He pretty much realized at that point that it was not a nice young lady that he was communicating with, it was actually a man that turned out to be from Nigeria,” said DeMay.
DeMay said the scammers demanded money or they would leak the photos online. His son, Jordan, gave them everything he had. What happened next would change the DeMay family forever.
“Jordan messaged them and said, ‘I am going to kill myself right now because of you’ and they responded with, ‘Good, do it fast or we will make you do it’ and he shot himself in his bed,” said DeMay.
So far, in 2025, the Wisconsin Internet Crimes Against Children (ICAC) Task Force has received 103 cybertips related to sextortion. That’s closing in on half of the total for all of last year.
Tracy Scheffler is the founder of 5-Stones Dodge County, an organization that combats sex trafficking and the organizers of Wednesday’s event.
“Where someone is trying to blackmail you to try and get something out of you, 79% of the time that is money; other times that might be for revenge,” said Scheffler.
Scheffler said sextortion can happen to anyone with the internet.
If you or someone you know is being extorted, it is important that you:
- Stop communication with the extortionists
- Refuse to pay any demands
- Report it to law enforcement immediately
“Make two to three calls to different organizations when you are trying to find your way through something hard,” said Scheffler. “You don’t ever really know which one of those is really going to come on board with you and know what to do.”
DeMay said his son Jordan was too scared to tell anyone what he was going through. He said he wants kids out there to know that you should never be worried to talk about what they are going through.
”If you don’t want to tell your parents I get that part too, I think it is important that you do, I think it is very important that you do,” said DeMay. "As soon as they google sextortion, all of this information is going to come up and they are going to learn real quick and be thankful you did speak with them.”
DeMay was able to work with law enforcement and get some justice for his son’s death.
“It was a very important case for the FBI and our family,” said DeMay. “ I think it sent the message to a lot of these suspects overseas that just because there is a giant pond between us does not mean that we won’t send the whole weight of the U.S. government after you.”
